...and why she posts pictures, my story, and why is such a wonderful place for every misunderstood and ignored fat girl that’s been mistreated by the media driven society.
I’ve heard a lot of people throwing the “attention whore” phrase around a lot lately. There are attention whores here, no doubt about it. Not every girl is an attention whore though. Not every woman that posts a revealing picture is doing so to be objectified, fapped to, or validated as acceptable in any way shape or form.
With that said, I would like to share an opinion based on my own personal history and experiences. I feel writing this is necessary because a lot of fat admirers and guys that like curvy women are not fat, have never been fat and may never be fat in the future.
I will start out by saying that I’ve always been chubby, I was born 5lb. and ended up chubby by the time I was 3 years old. I was constantly poked and prodded by doctors because everyone was convinced I was born with diabetes, had a glandular problem or some rare disease. I will spare you with my life story so to make a long story short, I basically grew up with either being insulted, ignored or being lectured on why I should not eat this or that because people were “worried” for my health as if I was going to die of a heart attack by the time I was 15.
With people constantly watching what I ate and watching WHILE I ate, I started an age old habit of hiding food and eating it when no one was around. At dinner I would eat only half of my plate (which satisfied my grandparents, thinking I had finally “gotten the message”) and after dinner I would go to my room, take out whatever I had stashed before and ate it, going outside and throwing the evidence in the dumpster. I also had an abusive childhood and felt that if I stayed chubbier and undesirable no one would pay attention to me and ignore me so I wouldn’t have to worry about being hit or otherwise. From closet eating comes emotional eating and everything after that. BOOM, here I am. As of January 2007 I weighed 399lbs. (pant size 28) and I am currently down to 344lbs. (between 26 and 28)
The majority of the women on the site have spent their whole lives being ignored or avoided because of their size and/or the way they look. Whether we’re pretty in the face or not it’s been ingrained in us from childhood that fat = ugly and dumb and skinny = beautiful and successful. In highschool I was never looked at being “datable”, no one ever told me I was pretty, thus I never thought of myself as a sexual being.
In May of 2010 I was checking my facebook when I received a friend request from LoveTheseCurves. I have to admit, I thought it was just another plus size clothing business wanting another customer, but I looked at it anyway. I looked around the site and I was dumbfounded, you mean there are people in the world that LIKE being chubby?! There are people that LIKE them too?!?! When did this happen?! Before joining the site, I never posted pictures of myself on the internet, I hardly ever showed my face, much less my body. It took me about a month and a half before I would even get on cam in vid chat. When I did I received such a wonderful welcome and have been nurtured whole-heartedly by every person I’ve met on here (Tyger, Scram, Hippy, Steak, Zombs, Sel, Kat, Glen, Redskins, J, Kira, Captain, etc.). I slowly started to realize that it’s alright to be happy with your body no matter the size.
We all have problems with our bodies, but the reality of it is that it’s not going to change overnight. You should care for your body, nurture it, and treat it with respect as it’s the only one you have and you can’t get a new one.
My message to the women of :
I post pictures of my body because I want you to see it. Because I would rather (and hopefully) be an inspiration to someone with my same body type that doesn’t have the confidence and feels the need to hide their beautiful curves, lumps, dimples, etc. No matter your body type, you should be proud of what you’ve been given, what you’ve gained, where you are in life and show the world.
I encourage you to put yourself out there, reach out of your comfort zone and face the world. It’s through this that you get to know who YOU are and realize the beauty of what it is to be a chubby/fat/skinny woman. You are a woman, you are beautiful. PERIOD.
YOU DESERVE RESPECT. DEMAND IT.
My message to the men of :
The majority of the women that belong to this site are here because is a safe haven for the misunderstood and shunned fat woman, the proud bbw model, the girl that just wants to chat and have fun without her appearance hindering her. We’re here to inspire each other, encourage each other and let each other know, “hey, you’re beautiful no matter the size”. We look beyond breast size, pant size, and thickness of the thighs into the person deeper inside. These women are models, teachers, nurses, administrative assistants, customer service specialists. They are people and they deserve the same respect you men receive in your everyday life. They’re not “fap material” or “gud 2 bate 2”. They have brothers, sisters, parents, spouses, and children. They’re not whores because they choose to show their body and be an inspiration for other woman or just showcase their own love for their body.
For those men that I have come to know (and actually participate in the site and it’s wonderful success), you’re part of a rare breed that has the courage to spit out what the social media has been feeding you. You know who you are and you know what you like. I encourage you to come out of the fat closet if you haven’t already. Let the world know you love bigger women and let others know what stereotypes are simply not true. FAT IS BEAUTIFUL, IT IS NOT A FETISH, IT’S SIMPLY A PREFERENCE LIKE ANY OTHER. You also have nothing to be ashamed of by liking chubby women, so don’t let anyone tell you differently. You also deserve respect so, again, demand it.
For the chubby men who come here for acceptance and to meet curvy women. You’re awesome. I enjoy reading your posts, your issues with being a chubby man and I feel you need to be more vocal with your everyday problems. I know that is geared more towards women, but we WANT to hear about your problems as well. We WANT to know we’re not the only ones. You should aspire to be an inspiration to other chubby men on here that are also having trouble accepting themselves as well.
I will end this with saying that I truly love SuperJ for creating this site and I will forever be in his debt for showing me (and others) a world of understanding I would have never known otherwise.